Feeling alone is nothing new.
Feeling alone is nothing new.
I’ve felt alone all my life.
Never really felt like I connected with anyone.
Was always made to feel inferior to everyone and I needed to do better.
Life was a competition and I needed to do better than everyone else.
I was taught I was incapable of love.
I was taught that People only get close in order to learn how to hurt you more efficiently.
(That’s another entry entirely)
Now the positive: without being somewhat used to this feeling of being lonely... these past 3.5 years would’ve been absolutely insane.
I would’ve lost my mind a long time ago.
Seriously.
Feeling alone isn’t the problem.
It’s the feeling of “less than” that’s the slow killer.
The manipulative voice that whispers such sweet poisonous lies.
The one that doesn’t speak until I am most vulnerable.
At the Brink of sleep.
Silent Dead of darkness.
At the point of Exhaustion.
In a fit of Emotional Anger.
At the Mercy of a memory.
Furthering the cracks along a broken...
Heart? Soul? Mind? Man?
Kuresa’s Journal
Entry: The dark whispers back sometimes
MakeItToTomorrow
BeThe1To
KTupua
October 2019