Sometimes...
Sometimes...
Sometimes it’s hard to find where we belong.
Sometimes we think everything and everyone is attacking us.
Sometimes we just want to shut the world out and put up our own soul quarantine...
the silence feels familiar and good. The darkness feels... comfortable...
so we exchange one poison we don’t know for the one we know and we drink deep...
Many times we don’t feel good enough, the voices are too loud telling us how unworthy and undeserving we are...
they scream and shout hate and anger at us from within our own minds and all we hear is that we’re tolerated,
we’re ugly...
if people had better judgement, and better choice of people to be around, they would never choose me.
It’s so easy to try to find defense and shelter in our own darkness that we try so hard to escape...
the unhealthy seclusion...
the self loathing...
we take so many precautions to lock everything and everyone out because we believe the source of pain is outside...
That’s not the truth all the time...
our minds manipulate everything into a combative statement and does everything to get us alone,
away from distraction so the real turmoil and assault can begin...
we put a hate filter on everything we see and hear
and then we torture ourselves over and over in the silence and darkness that is supposed to be our “safe zone”
Stop.
That is not the truth.
Don’t let the inner voices of self loathing beat you down...
Reach out.
You don’t have to go through this alone.
You are Loved.
You Matter.
You find a way to #MakeItToTomorrow
Together... we can make it thru the dark..
KTupua
March 2020